Sparks' Family 7th Annual Day of Thankfulness

Today marks the 7th day of the Sparks' Family Day of Thankfulness.  To be honest we were crazy busy with fun little cousins in town and time spent on fields and at the church.  We will sit down and write out letters tomorrow!  Please take a moment to read what and why this day is different then any other day to our family.  I hope it encourages you in some way!

 

7  years ago today(Oct 17th), we had a 15 day old baby. She seemed perfect to us.  She was thriving, she was getting chubby. She was just like a little baby doll we had brought home from the hospital! She had the adventure of being in the NICU for about a week. But in the NICU she was still a healthy little baby. She had some things about her that puzzled the doctors and of course the geneticist. So of course they decided to run a few tests. Mainly ‘rule’ out certain things. So the doctors say to us, “Do not worry. We will have results in about a week. The Geneticist says to us, “We are looking for ABC, ABCD, ABCDE, ABCDEF and ABCDEFG. But whatever you do, do NOT look it up on the internet. So as parents we hear, “You will painfully wait to hear horrible news.” And “If you look this up on the Internet you will know that your life is changed forever and the horror will about do you in!” So what do we do? We go to the ‘tree’ and eat the ‘fruit’. We get more knowledge and images in our head then we know what to do with. We plead for days, literally on our knees. I remember seeing knee prints in the carpet on the side of my bed every morning when I forced myself to get up. I had heard people talk about ‘falling to their knees in prayer for their children.’ I now was experiencing it in my life. I pleaded with the Lord on behalf of my baby, on behalf of myself and husband, but also on behalf of my other children. That was honestly the longest week of my life(it was about 2 weeks actually). I prayed so much, ‘Lord don’t let her have this or that.  Lord show me what we will look like as a family if she has this.’

So the week went on. I was able to put a smile on my face. As people brought dinner and awed over my new baby, I was able to keep the anxiety hidden(I thought anyway).

So, then Friday comes. 4:50 has arrived and we still have not heard anything from our pediatrician who has become the messenger. I grabbed Chloe to go get Slurpies down the street. Just a little 5 year old girl, thrilled to have another little sister, she had no idea what was going to happen that day. And she has never forgotten. As we pulled up to 7/11, I looked at my phone. I needed to make sure it was on. Surely I had missed the call from the doctor. No luck. We walked in to get the Slurpies for Chloe and the 3 little ones. My mom was with everyone else at the house. All I could think was, at 5pm on Friday the doctor will go home and I will hear nothing until Monday! As we were walking out with a tray of drinks, my phone rings. It is the pediatrician. He tells me ALL the test results are negative. I hear “You painfully waited to hear wonderful news.” And “You don’t have to live through the horrible images you saw on the internet and your life will not take this turn!” And all I could say was “PRAISE GOD!” In fact I screamed it! I looked at Chloe and said it over and over! She looked at me and said, “Do we need to pray?” I said, “Yes!” She had an amazing Kindergarten teacher that allowed and encouraged her class to pray on their knees. So she set the drinks down and got on her knees at 7/11. I followed suit. We prayed in thanksgiving for what the Lord had answered. Chloe didn't know what it was all about. She just knew that it meant her baby sister was going to be ok.  I called my husband and mom and could barely talk.  I got home and couldn't stop crying and loving on our new baby.

 

What I learned that day, was that the Lord comes when He knows you need Him. I wanted Him to answer these questions earlier. I wanted to never have had to ask these questions. I wanted it all to happen then. But I would have missed my knees raw from kneeling in prayer for my family. I would have missed the rejoicing in a parking lot while people just stopped and stared. I would have missed the sweet sweet moment with Chloe as she, a 5 year old, lead me to the ground to humble ourselves in rejoice!

I also learned that although those prayers were answered, we still have obstacles ahead of us. That although my sweet 7 year old didn't have ‘ABD ABCD ABCDE ABCDEF’ she still will be challenged in so many ways as she grows and learns. And when one person in your family is challenged, we all are. But I still KNOW that HE answered our prayers on that day.

My children(prayerfully) will most likely not have a shocking testimony of coming to Christ. They have been living in Christ and He in them since they were conceived. But what I pray they all, including my 7 year old will have, is the testimony of Him answering prayers. The testimony of knowing when we go to Him the answer is in Him. Knowing that without Him, we can do nothing.

So, ever since this day, in 2008, we have made a point to sit down and write a letter of thankfulness to someone in our lives that we are thankful for. The kids are precious in what they write and who they send it to. I usually help Savannah:) It is hard for me to narrow it down. I have about 100 letters I could write every year. But I realized who I am thankful for beyond words…JESUS.  Thank You for Your forgiveness when I doubt. Thank You for showing up, when I feel I cannot. Thank You for the amazing miracles you have given me in my life. Thank You for the perfect little baby you sent me 7 years ago and all the heart ache, laughter and joy that has come alongside her.

___________________________________________

  

 Savannah's 7th Birthday.  She so loves being celebrated!  And we love to celebrate her!

 There are a lot of things she has to work harder at, but being super cute is not one of them!

 Her first day of 1st grade, we all walked her in to school!  Her sisters and brother were so proud of her!

She is my joy!

This past week has been like a flash back of my life as a mother.  With a 12, two 9 year olds, an 8 year old and a 6 year old, life is always moving at a fast pace.  I try hard to slow down at times.  I love a raining bad weather day that shuts us down.  I long for summer to just be with the kids(well, at least the first part of summer).  The days are long, but the years are fast.  It is true.  My little sister is like a remake of my years of 5 under 5.  (well except she is a slacker and is really 4 under the age of 5).  This past week she flew in with her hubs and ditched her 4 kids on my mom and I .  They left to house hunt.  It was a blessing to have little bitties in my house again.  A 2.5 year old that just says yes to everything and a 5 year old that is content playing in the dirt.  My kids loved having them around as well.  Then the 1 year old twins.  Life doesn't get better then smiley drooley kids that are happy just because you pick them up.  The visual of my sister and her husband dragging the kids through multiple airports, loading and unloading people from the car, always having to assist someone in something just brought back a flood of emotions.  I am glad that I was able to do all that for my kids at a young age.  I am so glad that I actually enjoyed it, too.  I was exhausted(I live in that state) but it doesn't seem to matter because I loved and still do love doing for them.  I realized how over time my family, although we do have structure, has become less structured as the kids get older.  Having the little ones in the house last week.. man, they expected a real meal.. and like at a real time!  I forgot how we use to do things.  Our days revolved around our schedule of naps and meals.  Now our meals revolve around our day, and I long for naps!  It is fun to have this glimpse again of life with little bitty kids.  That is all... carry on.,

Sweet 1 year old boys

The 2 oldest visiting Lunch with my twins

 Savannah and Daddy being attacked by a 2.5 year old

 The big boys coming to watch a winning ball game with Corbin

 Corbin loving having '2 baby brothers' for a few days

 Twins playing with twins

Stop killing Christmas

I have the husband that doesn't jump at sharing his opinion. He usually focuses on what he can do to better himself as a person for our family.  Rarely does he even go outside the family on any type of critique. He is one of those men that saves his words, so when he does speak I certainly know it is of importance. He also never uses Facebook, with exception to an OSU game or our son's commentary on life.  Oh and the occasional ridiculous picture of me!  So again, when he does post something it certainly is something that he feels is very worth sharing.  Here is what I came across that he recently posted.  And to be honest his words ring so true.

I rarely rant, but indulge me. To the father who brought your 6 yr old to the rated R movie: Look, I get it. I have 5 kids and have seen every animated movie made in the last 12 years. If you hear "Let it go" one more time you're going lose your mind. So who doesn't want to see a good old war movie? But brotha, you got to leave the kids at home.
As a young man, I always loved the quote, "A mind stretched by a new idea can never return to its original state". Knowledge is powerful and that's good. But now, as a father, I see it very differently. Sometimes knowledge robs us of our innocence. It fades for us all eventually but our memories of our innocence are at the heart of our humanity. This is why trips to Disney World and Christmas traditions are so special for many of us. But just as it's hard to recall things that happened when you were very young, the younger you lose your innocence the harder it is to remember what it felt like. I know the world will take it from my kids eventually, but as a parent it is my duty to protect it for as long as possible. So, Dad in the theater, suck it up and wait. It'll be on Netflix in 3 weeks. In the meantime, quit killing Christmas.

THANKFUL isn't even the 1/2 of it! (this is a few days late)

October 17th, it came and went.  I cannot believe I am behind!  It is an important day for the Sparks' family.  We all celebrate birthdays, right!  We celebrate Christmas, the birth of Christ.  We celebrate Easter, new everlasting life.  We celebrate a lot of things!  But our family is so incredibly fortunate to celebrate hope, thankfulness, faith and family.  I will post what this day is about, but then add some thoughts that I have after another year of reflecting and living...
________________________________________________

6  years ago today(Oct 17th), we had a 15 day old baby. She seemed perfect to us.  She was thriving, she was getting chubby. She was just like a little baby doll we had brought home from the hospital! She had the adventure of being in the NICU for about a week. But in the NICU she was still a healthy little baby. She had some things about her that puzzled the doctors and of course the geneticist. So of course they decided to run a few tests. Mainly ‘rule’ out certain things. So the doctors say to us, “Do not worry. We will have results in about a week. The Geneticist says to us, “We are looking for ABC, ABCD, ABCDE, ABCDEF and ABCDEFG. But whatever you do, do NOT look it up on the internet. So as parents we hear, “You will painfully wait to hear horrible news.” And “If you look this up on the Internet you will know that your life is changed forever and the horror will about do you in!” So what do we do? We go to the ‘tree’ and eat the ‘fruit’. We get more knowledge and images in our head then we know what to do with. We plead for days, literally on our knees. I remember seeing knee prints in the carpet on the side of my bed every morning when I forced myself to get up. I had heard people talk about ‘falling to their knees in prayer for their children.’ I now was experiencing it in my life. I pleaded with the Lord on behalf of my baby, on behalf of myself and husband, but also on behalf of my other children. That was honestly the longest week of my life(it was about 2 weeks actually). I prayed so much, ‘Lord don’t let her have this or that.  Lord show me what we will look like as a family if she has this.’

So the week went on. I was able to put a smile on my face. As people brought dinner and awed over my new baby, I was able to keep the anxiety hidden(I thought anyway).

So, then Friday comes. 4:50 has arrived and we still have not heard anything from our pediatrician who has become the messenger. I grabbed Chloe to go get Slurpies down the street. Just a little 5 year old girl, thrilled to have another little sister, she had no idea what was going to happen that day. And she has never forgotten. As we pulled up to 7/11, I looked at my phone. I needed to make sure it was on. Surely I had missed the call from the doctor. No luck. We walked in to get the Slurpies for Chloe and the 3 little ones. My mom was with everyone else at the house. All I could think was, at 5pm on Friday the doctor will go home and I will hear nothing until Monday! As we were walking out with a tray of drinks, my phone rings. It is the pediatrician. He tells me ALL the test results are negative. I hear “You painfully waited to hear wonderful news.” And “You don’t have to live through the horrible images you saw on the internet and your life will not take this turn!” And all I could say was “PRAISE GOD!” In fact I screamed it! I looked at Chloe and said it over and over! She looked at me and said, “Do we need to pray?” I said, “Yes!” She had an amazing Kindergarten teacher that allowed and encouraged her class to pray on their knees. So she set the drinks down and got on her knees at 7/11. I followed suit. We prayed in thanksgiving for what the Lord had answered. Chloe didn't know what it was all about. She just knew that it meant her baby sister was going to be ok.  I called my husband and mom and could barely talk.  I got home and couldn't stop crying and loving on our new baby.

 

What I learned that day, was that the Lord comes when He knows you need Him. I wanted Him to answer these questions earlier. I wanted to never have had to ask these questions. I wanted it

all to happen then. But I would have missed my knees raw from kneeling in prayer for my family. I would have missed the rejoicing in a parking lot while people just stopped and stared. I would have missed the sweet sweet moment with Chloe as she, a 5 year old, lead me to the ground to humble ourselves in rejoice!

I also learned that although those prayers were answered, we still have obstacles ahead of us. That although my sweet 6 year old didn't have ‘ABD ABCD ABCDE ABCDEF’ she still will be challenged in so many ways as she grows and learns. And when one person in your family is challenged, we all are. But I still KNOW that HE answered our prayers on that day.

My children(prayerfully) will most likely not have a shocking testimony of coming to Christ. They have been living in Christ and He in them since they were conceived. But what I pray they all, including my 6 year old will have, is the testimony of Him answering prayers. The testimony of knowing when we go to Him the answer is in Him. Knowing that without Him, we can do nothing.

So, ever since this day, in 2008, we have made a point to sit down and write a letter of thankfulness to someone in our lives that we are thankful for. The kids are precious in what they write and who they send it to. I usually help Savannah:) It is hard for me to narrow it down. I have about 100 letters I could write every year. But I realized who I am thankful for beyond words…JESUS.  Thank You for Your forgiveness when I doubt. Thank You for showing up, when I feel I cannot. Thank You for the amazing miracles you have given me in my life. Thank You for the perfect little baby you sent me 6 years ago and all the heart ache, laughter and joy that has come alongside her.

___________________________________________

   I want to share a couple of thoughts.. 

1) I was so upset with myself when I realized, we missed our own day of celebration!  But as I thought about it, I laughed.  I laughed in happiness of missing it.  What I realized is Savannah is so 'just another typical Sparks' kid' in so many ways, that we just have moved along.  That actually makes me happy!  No huge events that have caused us to need to stop life.  In fact, she is thriving at her new school!  

2) The other thing is, I wanted to see what the Bible really tells us about what it means to be thankful.  I mean we say thank you about many things, our drink at Chic fil A, someone running toilet paper to the paperless bathroom(maybe just my house), when the light turns green and you really needed to be some place 5 minutes ago.  But what does it look like to be thankful to the Lord.  This is what I came up with after looking in my very warn out Bible(seriously, I need to take it to the Bible doctor): 

 

In Psalm 100:4, David says, “Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise. Give thanks to Him, bless His name.” What we should see if that a thankful heart is ready to give thanks at anytime, because we have a redeemer who is ready to hold us ALL the time.  Later in Psalm 103:1-5, David goes on and nudges us, “Bless the LORD, O my soul, And all that is within me, bless His holy name. Bless the LORD, O my soul, And forget none of His benefits; Who pardons all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases; Who 

redeems your life from the pit, Who crowns you with loving kindness and compassion; Who satisfies your years with good things, So that your youth is renewed like the eagle.” 

I really cannot compete with those words in the Bible.  I think that sums it up pretty well.  I am so thankful for all my children, my dedicated husband and my amazing God who heals us in so many ways.  And Savannah Jane Sparks.  She is a gift, a joy, an amazing opportunity to see God's perfect creation in an imperfect world.  The joy and laughter she has for life blows me away.  When I see how much harder she works then anyone else in our family to do stuff, she does it with a little sas and a lot of joy.  Honestly the J in her middle name could easily have stood for Joy.  So as I sit down and write a little note to my 'thankful for person' this year, I realize there are SO many people I am thankful for.  I am thankful for EVERY person who loves my daughter.  Who rejoices in her accomplishments, who prays on her behalf, who hurt when she struggles.  And I am so thankful for all those people who have yet to come.  Who haven't had the touch of the spicy little red head we call Nana Jane, but are sure to be blessed by her later in life... all in God's timing!

What a summer.  As we approach our last full day of summer vacation, I seem to get lost in all the things we did not do.  So I am forcing myself to see the things we did do.
1.  The older girls had their first week of camp experience.  They loved every day.  It was so fun to get them ready to go and even more fun to pick them up.
2.  Corbin got to have a just dad trip to the lake.  He really enjoyed the lack of girls!  I love that they got to spend that time together.
3.  All 5 kids attended VBS.  Terrific week digging in God's word.
4.  We had a great time at the lake with MeeMaw and Pop and our cousins.  The kids absolutely love being out doors.  I loved watching them have so much fun shooting off fireworks for the 4th of July.
5.  Laurel and Anabelle experienced their first swim meets.  They did amazing.
6.  Savannah had her first real swim lessons.  She did very well and I am so encouraged for what is to come with my little Nana Jane.
7.  Chloe rocked soccer.  She played on an indoor team and really stretched her athletic ability as well as her faith!
8.  We got the coolest visit with our oldest Colorado cousin, and Corbin had a big brother for 4 days.  Great week for him!
9.  Savannah completed another summer of summer school and is trying so hard to use words with her signs!  It is a wonderful thing to hear!
10.  Chloe attended her first mission trip away from me.  It was a great trip.
11.  All the big kids went to creative arts camp and rocked Peter Pan.  So proud of them.
12.  We had the best 3.5 week visit from our Utah cousins.  Who could ask for anything better!
13.  We took a quick trip to Fort Worth for food, fun and Six Flags!
14.  We had a fun little visit from our 4 Colorado cousins and just played!
15.  We will wrap it up tomorrow with something..

Corbin and the English language

So my kids (twins and Corbin) keep using the word object instead of eject. I crack up every time. The DVD has not objected yet. So I explain they are not the same word. Laurel explains object....I object to the question(like she is in court). Then Corbin says what is eject? I said when something comes out. Like the DVD. He proceeds to say 'my poop needs to eject'. I proceed to hide my laughter while Fred says 'great use of the word'. I'm guessing we are stopping soon for a bathroom.


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Location:Muskogee, Oklahoma

Who's the biggest stakeholder?

 

 So often, as parents, we turn to the 'experts'.  We are all educated in different areas of life.  I certainly would never tell a heart surgeon how to do his job!  But at times it becomes easy to just rely on someone else because they know more, or they are more experienced in that field.  When the light comes on in our car because something is wrong, most of the time we don't even look at a manual.  We just 'take it in.'  We have someone look at the problem, tell us what is needed, and go from there.
      But here, I am talking about our children.  First, we have to remember, they are not ours.  They have been giving to us.  They have been entrusted to us.  They are on loan to us.  The only manual, the Bible.  A verse that has always been a part of our parenting is, Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.  This is a constant reminder that it is our job and requirement to train our children.  Specifically in the direction of the Lord.  But, what about how and who and where and when?  Outside of training our children in the word of The Lord, there is educating them in the academia world.  Granted these can and should go hand and hand.  Some people do it through public school, home school, private school and so on.  For some, the decisions are easier.  They love their school and they love however they have decided to be sure their children are in the word of The Lord.  Then, there is me.
   Let me start by pointing out, I cannot think of anything I have ever purchased that did not take a lot of time.  Or even a return.  And most definitely a mulling over after it was home.  So when it came to school for our kids, to say it was not easy is an understatement.  I still remember the 2nd day of kindergarten for my oldest child.  She wanted so badly to get out in carpool line.  I had her in the car, and 3 other car seats with children 3 and under sitting in the back seats.  I also had a baby in my belly that would arrive in a month.  My little kindergartner got out of my car and walked away like a big girl.  I pulled forward and parked my car sobbing.  My car seemed so quiet!  Realize I still had 3 loud little kids in the car and a baby kicking in my tummy!  I knew I loved the school she was walking into.  I had amazing teachers and the Word of God being poured into her!  I called my husband in tears saying, "We made a mistake!  We need to only send her for 1/2 a day!"  She was fine, and I got over it all!  This was a bright kid walking into a school that I knew could teach her in all the ways she needed and we desired.
   But if we fast forward that day 5 years down the road, we approach a similar but un-chartered territory for me.  Our youngest of 5, who has some hearing impairment and communication delays, is approaching her kindergarten year.  At this point I have successfully (with tears) managed to send off 4 children to kindergarten.  But this time it is different.  This time, I am not 100% sure what type of learning she needs.  I am not positive that I have all the information on her strengths and challenges.  The school options I know about, well frankly I don't know anything about the staff and what their beliefs are.  This is terrifying for me.  But, I grab my stoic husband and we begin the grueling process of evaluations and ARDs(if you don't know what an ARD meeting is, well you can possibly count yourself lucky to avoid the stress).   Once all the 'data' is collected on our child, we get an evaluation back.  To be honest, I couldn't even read it in one sitting.  Imagine having ALL the places in your life that you are deficient in put on paper.  I certainly would have a long list waiting for me to see!  But that is what an evaluation like this is.  Sure it has some 'strengths' and positive points.  But that is not the bulk of it all.  So then we take all of that and meet.  We meet with multiple people in a room.  A teacher that has been with our child most of the year, maybe another staff member that has as well.  The other 4 or 5 people in the room are 'experts' in their field.  No, they do not in anyway claim to 'know' our child.  They are also very careful to not compare her to another child.  Their job is to work towards figuring out the best way to educate our child.  We, as parents.. educated parents... involved parents.. are also interested in how to best educate our child.   We, as parents, have some thoughts and ideas on what that will look like.
    In passionate discussions, our visions were not the same.  They were similar, but not the same as the 'experts'.  Some experts did not want to see our 'way'.  As discouraged as we felt, it came down to 1 final thought for us.  We, as parents of this child that has been placed on loan to us from the Lord, are the #1 stakeholders in our child's life, next to the child.  In ANY other setting, the biggest stakeholder should really have the final say.  We, as parents and a family, will be the most affected(outside of our child) by our child's success in the education they receive.  So, bottom line.... this is OUR decision.  This is OUR responsibility.  It can seem easy to pass it along to the experts. In fact I found that in a lot of settings it is expected and pushed to let the experts decide. But this is OUR child.  So, we are going to do this OUR way.
   We are truly fortunate to have had experts with us in these meetings that in the end, understood where we were coming from.  This is not always the case.  We have been on the other side of that, where out of shear pride, the 'experts' were not going to see OUR side of what we felt was needed.  And we learned from that.  I think it was there we learned, we are the biggest stakeholders.  We have been entrusted with not just 1 child who needs us to work for them, but 5.  We are not so boastful to say we won't possibly have a moment of  'oh, maybe that wasn't the right plan.'  But when we know the desire's of our heart for our child are based on the faith we have in Jesus, we cannot deny that.
   So, be the stakeholder that champions for you children, your spouse, your family...and Jesus.